Giving it up for Lent

For some reason, probably tied to my "Voodoo Catholic" upbringing, I have the urge to give something up for Lent. I'm not looking to suffer, mind you. I'm already on Weight Watchers and will not be giving up anything that I'm still allowed to ingest. Those Very Filling Foods are mine, ALL MINE! So back off, or I'll whack you with a celery stalk!

I digress. For some reason, I really like old junk and I don't know how it came to this. It could have been fine art, fine wine or even stamps, but nooooooo, I had to pick used clothing and old books! Around the world, people are forgoing the pleasures of tobacco, alcohol and dessert in this Lenten season. So, I'm going to hit myself where I live! For the forty days of Lent, I have decided to stay out of thrift stores!

Yes, nosing around thrift stores is one of my main hobbies, but I need to go on a junk-free diet. Even when I really score at the Goodwill, we just end up with more stuff in the house. And we have stuff galore! I have so much stuff I forget what I have. Opening a closet around here is like Christmas. A Waltons/Little House on the Prairie kind of crap Christmas, but fun in a tiny, warmy way. (Oooh! Sealing wax and a frayed bungee cord! I love you, Pa!) So, I'm off the stuff!

And it will be hard for me. It really will. I likes me some old stuff, yes indeedy! It will hurt! And so, as most penitents are wont to ask,"What's in it for me? " This sacrifice will probably net me about 10 free hours over the next forty days, in 15 minute increments. I wonder what I will do to "kill" those extra minutes when there's not enough time to go home between errands. I'll probably end up reading or knitting in my car or going to Starbucks and spending twice as much as I would on a thrift store blouse for a venti latte. So less junk, a tiny bit more time, with a little more spending thrown in, just to make me feel less deprived. That's what it's going to get me. I feel more holy already.

Note: We will be hosting a yardsale to benefit Comet's preschool at the end of April, so I'll be able to do a whole Lent's worth of clutter collecting in a minutes in my own front yard. Praise be!

How did I ever get so interesting?